Tips for Putting Together Outfits

As you may have heard on my new Youtube channel, last weekend I had an amazing time at the Southern Comfort Conference in Atlanta, GA. The weather was gorgeous, there were tons of educational seminars on all things Trans, and I met amazing women from all over the world. I had a blast!

We spend a lot of time talking about fundamental ideas on how to dress in ways that flatter our bodies, as well as basic "theories" behind style. While I feel these lessons are a great place to start getting our minds thinking the right way about clothing and style choices, it is sometimes difficult to take that next leap into apply those lessons to our everyday look. To help you start to think along the right lines I'd like to show you an outfits I wore during the conference and just describe what was going through my mind when I picked it out. As I start in full-time (soooo soon now!), I'll try to do this kind of thing (an "outfit of the day") more often to not only showcase my fabulous style (hey! at least I think so, and thats all that matters :-P) , but also give insights in how and why I make certain style choices. Always keeping in mind, there is no right or wrong way to do this! This is just MY way of approaching things. I also highly recommend going back and re-reading the post on "6 Keys to Creating a "Put-Together Look" or at least keeping it open alongside as you read, because I will refer to it throughout this post. Here they are for a quick overview, again, if you want more description, please check out that post:

1. Create a Wardrobe that Fits and is Flattering
2. Ask Yourself the Important Questions About Dressing Appropriately
3. Chose What to Feature in an Outfit
4. Use Color Intentionally
5. Coordinate elements of an outfit
6. Respect the Intangibles of Quality Style and Design

As I'm sure you've noticed from the blog, my style is feminine, but contemporary. I lean towards more edgy looks for nighttime... thats when I let my inner "rock star" come out a bit more. We'll just look at a daytime look today.

When putting together an outfit, I typically start with a piece that I really want to wear and build from there. This speaks right to #3, the piece I want to feature. For this outfit, that piece is the periwinkle blue maxi skirt... It has a great color and texture (#6) and maxi's are "in" at the moment, plenty of reasons to feature it. It is tough to see,but the outer layer of skirt is sheer, with a shorter (mid thigh) opaque skirt underneath. This gives a touch of sex appeal while still maintaining a healthy dose of modesty appropriate for daytime outfits (#2). Save your crazy sexy looks for nighttime!

So what works about this skirt? Most importantly, it has a high waist. See how it comes all the way up to my natural waist? That makes my legs look longer and my torso shorter, both typically flattering things for trans body-types (#1). With a great piece to work off of picked out I then just set out to complete the rest of the outfit.

I paired the skirt with a basic, true white cami.... I apologize that my chest looks like the surface of the sun in the picture. I wanted to keep the outfit light and summery (#4), so I didn't pick a darker top. My poor little point and shoot camera couldn't quite keep up with the brilliant southern midday sun! I would say that this top is not the "perfect" choice for the outfit because it doesn't necessarily add any flattering effects. Bright colors highlight areas and make them look bigger (sorry, but my bust looks huge here!), so this is technically making my torso/bust bigger. So how am I getting away with it? For one, the skirt is doing the opposite super well, and secondly, despite how it looks in the picture, it doesn't cover over my shoulders, so they stay appearing exactly as big as they are, I'm OK with that. While outside was gorgeously sunny and warm, inside the hotel at the seminars in the AC was freeeeeezing, which is why I added a flowy (coordinating with the lines of the skirt), grey cardigan over this for most of the day (again #2).

As you can see, in addition to keeping me warm, the sweater also lessens the "enlarging" effects of the light color on top despite being fairly light colored itself. Especially in transitional seasons like Fall and Spring, it helps to have a layer like a sweater you can add or remove depending on the temperature as you change location. Look at your outfit with this outer layer both on and off, make sure its cute both ways. It stink to be "trapped" in a sweater when you're too hot because you can't take it off without looking silly (though I say be comfortable and look silly anyways, however if you can avoid that problem, do it!). 

Now that my outfit is complete with its basics (top, bottom, ready for whatever weather)... I then move into accessorizing to give the look the details that really bring everything together aesthetically. Can you pick out the theme to my coordination from my sweater, accessories, and shoes? If you said silver, you're correct... if you said something else, you're probably right too... after all, you're pretty smart ;-) Hey, coordination? isn't that one of the 6 keys? why yes... yes it is! Number 5 :-)

I've accessorized with a geometric pendant necklace, a silver belt (its reversible, white on the other side, wonderfully versatile), and one of my favorite bracelets, a navy/pink rope bracelet. Aside from being pretty and shiny, each accessory has a purpose. Granted, when I put outfits together I don't always plan a purpose for everything (I'm always happy to take unnecessary credit for it though haha), but analyzing things later its nice to see why they work. The belt serves to define my waist (#1) and helps offer a transition for the eye from the skirt to my top. More functionally, it also helps hide if things aren't tucked in just perfect, or bunching around there (keeps those love-handles squished in too haha). The necklace adds a bit of visual interest (#6), the geometric/angular shapes contrast the flowy, light lines of the rest of the outfit. This slight visual "tension" gives more of a contemporary feel (that is my own personal style). My bracelet breaks a bit from the silver trend, adds a new color or two, but offers a bit of my personality to things (#6)... I'm from Cape Cod, MA, the Cape is very nautically themed if you don't know, so for me, it helps express my region too. The fact I didn't chose a straight up silver bracelet was a conscious choice... too much coordination gets to be what people say as: "too matchy matchy" which creates more of a contrived look rather than fresh and stylish. Its ok to have some things not coordinate perfectly with the "theme" of an outfit.

Finally, I usually choose shoes last... not sure why, thats just how I roll, I spend most of my time barefoot at home, so it is sometimes an after thought to put shoes on for me. For this outfit I chose silver (again with the coordination), gladiator sandals.

They are flat and comfy, good for walking around all day at a conference (#2), while the straps do a fabulous job at breaking up the line of my foot, making my feet look smaller. The lovely wine red nail polish goes fabulously with the color of the skirt (and basically every other color too) and adds a nice attention to detail (#6) touch. If you are going to wear open to shoes, do your nails, make sure they look cute, it will help add to that "put-together" look we're after.

Hopefully this very detailed analysis proves helpful in thinking about putting together outfits. Don't feel like you have to go into deep thought every time you get dressed. There are enough things to worry about in life. Trust your eye... most of this thought happens instinctively. Things that follow these six guidelines will simply "look right" to you, things that don't simply will look a little off... you don't necessarily have to know why :-)

Have fun! 

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Softening a Strong or Angular Jaw line: Necklaces to work with your Face Shape

I’m excited to see that more people are discovering “A Stylish Transition”. We just past 1000 views, and are just past 80 Facebook fans. Yay!...  if you’ve newly found us… Welcome! 

One of the most popular posts thus far has been our discussion of the most flattering neckline styles. I thought I’d rekindle and expand on the topic to discuss face shapes and how to best work with each one to achieve a more feminine image. We’ll look at necklaces and how to pick just the right one for whatever your favorite outfit may be. When paired with the right neckline, necklaces can do wonders to soften a strong jaw line or square, rectangular or triangular shaped face. Trans-women don’t always fall into these categories, but if you do, it may be something you’d like to soften up. I have an oval or oblong shaped face for example… its not overly angular but still benefits from a little softening (don’t we all right?). As always, there are plenty of ways we can make our jaw lines softer while making our necklines dazzling. If you are unsure of your face shape, compare it to the picture below. As you can see... rectangular, square and triangular all have “strong” more masculine jawlines. Face shapes are also very important to consider when choosing a flattering hair style, however we’ll save that for another post!

Before we get into the specifics, let’s look at the basics and learn the lingo (so we can at least sound like we know what we’re talking about!) Necklaces are classified generally by length. Below you’ll see the 6 most common necklace lengths:

I find a graphic like this to be especially helpful for reference when buying jewelry online. Sites will always give you at least the necklace length, so you can get a general idea of how it’ll fall when you wear it.

As you will remember from our discussion on flattering necklines, if we’re looking to shrink broad shoulders we’re typically looking for scoop, v-neck or perhaps even cowl neck styles, anything to break up the shoulder line. For the group of face shapes I mentioned above, we are looking to soften the hard angular lines of the face by:

1. Adding the appearance of length to the face to give the appearance of stretching out those hard angles
2. Add more curved lines around the neck to create a softer “framing” for the jaw.

We’ll start by pairing necklaces with our “go-to” necklines, but also take a look at others since you certainly shouldn’t limit yourself to only those styles. In fact, with the right necklace, some of the less flattering choices can become much more friendly.

Before we start, here are a few general necklace guidelines I always try to be conscious of:

-      Avoid lengths where the bottom of the necklace hits right at the neckline. It will simply get lost in the lines of the top and look unpolished. If this happens, you can adjust the length either with a built in clasp or by using an extender.

-      Think of your neckline as a frame for your necklace. Consider:  How does the shape of the neckline showcase the necklace?

-      Not every outfit needs a necklace! Having too many competing pieces in an ensemble detracts from everything.

Without further ado, let’s jump into some examples:

First, we have a teal, v-neck sweater with a princess length, heart pendant necklace. With pendant style necklaces, the line created by the necklace chain is typically a “V” shape. This pairs well with v-necklines and just like the neckline, helps to elongate the jaw and face vertically, softening any hard edges. Take a look:

Notice how the neckline frames the nicely centered heart. This is typical the type of look I wear most when choosing a princess length necklaces. It is very “classic” cute… and will work on most everyone. Be careful wearing really thin chains and tinier necklaces if you are especially built in the upper body as it may exaggerate things through contrast. Instead, chose something less fragile looking to avoid the necklace looking out of place.

Just as a pendant creates a “V” shape, a necklace that is a simple chain alone will create a more curved shape as it rests against your chest. For example:

This silver chain is paired with a fairly deep scoop neck top. The curved lines of the top and the necklace compliment each other and also help the eye to “expect” curves rather than sharp angular lines. This effect can help soften harder jaw line. The opposite holds true as well… typically you’ll want to avoid angular, geometrically shaped necklaces if you have a more rectangular jaw line.

Let’s explore another look:

Yes, you are seeing clearly… there is no necklace here! I wanted to make sure I re-iterated my point from earlier, not every outfit needs a necklace. Don’t feel pressured into accessorizing every possible option. This deep plunging V-neck does a fabulous job of lengthening my face and jaw line vertically; many necklace choices with this outfit would just break up that lengthening effect and create clutter. Could one wear a necklace here? Yes, but my style choice is always on the side of less is more.

If you recall from the flattering necklines post, crew necks did not rate super favorably when compared to the other, more flattering choices. Let’s take a look at how a necklace can enhance the value of a neckline that doesn’t do much for us:

Here, this long, rope or lariat length necklace serves to create a stretched vertical line that in essence, creates a new neckline for the top. Try pairing longer necklaces with necklines that are more horizontal such as crew or boat necks to add that helpful vertically stretching line.

Just for fun, our last example is a choker length statement necklace:

Again, this necklace exhibits both curving lines and extending vertical lines for all those jaw-softening effects. Bold statement necklaces, especially those with some bulk and volume also can make a jaw line appear smaller by contrast (that whole make something look smaller by putting something big next to it effect!). Let flashier pieces of jewelry such as this be a breathtaking focal point of an ensemble… they will get noticed and work best when not competing for attention with other parts of an outfit.

Thanks for checking out this post! Be sure to Like “A Stylish Transition” on facebook and share it with all your friends.

Cheers,

Kayci

Bracelets for Larger Hands and Wrists: Advice that could come in Handy!

Being a drummer, I have built up all sorts of fabulous muscles in my hands which help me play better… however, they also prevent me from slipping any sort of solid bracelet or bangle onto my wrist without dislocating my thumb! Drummer or not, trans-women have (on average) larger hands and wrists than cis-gender women, it’s a fact of life. Larger, bulky bracelets are not only trendy, but also help make hands look smaller by comparison, something we're typically interested in doing. If they’re too tight, you may run the risk of accomplishing just the opposite or, in my case, dislocating your thumb.

I have searched high and low for anywhere that makes larger diameter bangles and have yet to track down any reliable leads… if anyone has an insider scoop, please let me know! So… short of making my own (how hard could it be, right?) and with bangles and solid bracelets so popular nowadays, what options do we have to take their place?

The answer at first glance is: Stretch, Spiral/Coil, Cuffed, Hinged, and Clasped Bracelets. They all solve the problem of getting a bracelet onto your wrist without breaking your hand… so we’re half way there! About half the time for me, just going to these styles is enough to get the look I desire.

Unfortunately, the other half of the time (usually when something is super cute or I’m totally in love with it!) these readily available styles are still too tight around my wrist bones. Ideally, I like to have a bracelet loose enough to slide on my wrist and hang onto my hand a bit if my arm is at my side… not squeezed tightly like a coiling python! … to me, that loose fit is one of those little everyday feminine details I cherish. Luckily, I have a few tricks up my sleeve (sometimes literally haha) to modify easily available bracelets for that little bit of extra length! (These may not work with everything, but can certainly help in many cases)

• Spiral/Coil Bracelets: Spiral Bracelets are shaped like coils, or springs and despite any embellishments, almost always have a central spring-like wire that runs through the entirety of the coil. The trick here is simple, slowly and gently bend this central wire outwards to increase the diameter of the spiral. Work over the whole length of the coil, flattening out the curve and gradually it will relax, creating a larger bracelet! If you want the coil to stay perfectly even, be sure to bend gradually and slowly. Here's an example of a coiled bracelet I have "stretched" out a bit, it gives that "collection of bangles" appearance but as a single piece:

• Clasped bracelets: Clasped bracelets use a lobster claw, or other type of clasp to close around the wrist. For these, you can buy jewelry extenders (try a quick search on amazon.com) and then cut the extender to length till its just right for you. This trick also works (perhaps even better) with necklaces. Shown without an extender below, all you need to do is clasp the extender in line with the clasp already on the bracelet and you're good to go!

• Stretch Bracelets: Stretched bracelets are neat interlocking or patterned pieces repeated with a couple of hidden elastic strands threaded through everything to hold it all together. Cool concept, easy to put on, but typically a little to tight on me. This trick is the most labor intensive of the three, and works best with more inexpensive bracelets ($5-$10 range… think F21 type jewelry). First off, if you see a bracelet you want that is too tight, buy two… yes, I know, it’s twice as expensive, but work with me here, its only going to be $15 or so. You will also need to head to a craft store and buy some stretchy elastic cord that’ll fit through the thread holes in your bracelet. 

First, as shown above, you want to cut apart one of the bracelets and remove one set of the patterned pieces (or however many you think will make the proper increase in size). Next, take apart the other bracelet and remove the elastics. Lastly (the most time consuming step), re-string the bracelet back together, adding the pieces from the “donor” bracelet in as well. Tie it all off and viola! You have a new, looser fitting elastic bracelet!

Hope these tips make it easier to accessorize your wrists happily!

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